aloneby

Tis few days im gettin more n more emo le.. Even read a storybook can aso cry lk siao.. But e book somehow sounds lk mi.. One word in common: neglected.. Since e dae i graduated fm band, all of my juniors left mi behind.. To them, my words become not so impt.. Tey onli find their sl.. Im juz their rubbish.. Tey dun tok 2 mi.. Tey juz throw mi one side.. I couldnt join in wif them.. E more i wana join, e more i feel tt im being push out.. Im so jealous of other sections.. Their seniors came back n help them e juniors welcome them warmly n feel so glad.. My section? Last band prac, trumpet section\'s junior all so entu 2 invite eli 2 go in help 2 teach wif e gd scores.. Mi? C mi aso lk nv c.. Wif mi or not doesnt matter 2 them.. Even e sec1 treat mi as bad senior who onli threaten them wif punishments... I become a bad person... My world s gg black onli mi standin under e spotlight... I couldnt c them n tey couldnt c mi.. Wat i hav done wrong? I onli interact more wif them.. But yet e distance between us is greater.. I try 2 join in their lunch durin e june holi.. Tey nv give a place 2 sit.. Juz sae someone else sittin here.. Tis juz shows tt tey nv intend 2 give mi a place 2 sit.. Ya.. Im nobody mah.. Juz lk how he treat mi.. My tingy he wouldnt Nv rmb... But yet everythin of him, i rmb vividly.. Y everyone s treatin mi lk tt? Im reali feel so upset..
On fri, i hav my o lvl oral.. After oral. 1st tingy i wana do is 2 tell him bout it.. In e end, i saw him so thot he saw mi he would know.. But no! I was wrong... I bet he totally 4get bout it.. He didnt wish mi gd luck which im been waitin n didnt ask mi how was it... N yet i lk so silly 2 keep waitin... I keep tellin myself tt he didnt send e wishin.. nvm.. Cuz i got others ppl\'s.. But somehow i cant lie.. Reali cant.. During oral, i ruin it.. Sae wrong words conversation so short.. Keep stoppin.. E worst ting is i hate myself.. In tis state how am i gg 2 get A1.. Reali stupid of mi..
2dae i did sth wrong le.. reali feel so sry 2 tt person.. all bcuz of my fault...

~left alone~